Understanding feeding and mealtime behaviours
Mealtimes can be stressful for everyone.
Children might feel anxious or fearful about eating and food, leading to challenging behaviours. It's not always easy to create a calm and positive atmosphere, as factors like mood, energy levels, and environment can affect how a child reacts to food.
It's important to focus on small wins over time instead of expecting success at every meal.
Here are some factors that can affect your child's eating habits:
Energy levels
Children who are tired, grumpy, or full of energy may find it hard to sit down and eat. They might eat slowly, refuse food, or even throw a tantrum.
Medications
Some medications, such as over-the-counter pain relief or antibiotics, can affect appetite and cause digestive issues like nausea or diarrhoea. This makes mealtimes tricky, especially if new foods are introduced while your child is on medication and feeling unwell.
Stress
Stress can decrease appetite, as stress hormones can interfere with a child’s desire to eat.
Teething or dental issues
Pain from teething or dental problems can make eating uncomfortable and lead to less interest in food.
Illness
Common childhood illnesses, such as the flu, gastroenteritis, sore throat, and ear infections, can also affect a child's behaviour at mealtimes.
Food inconsistencies
Fresh fruits and vegetables can vary in taste and texture, which may cause your child to like a food one day and refuse it the next.
For example:
- blueberries in the same punnet can taste sweet or sour and feel firm or squishy
- bananas can go from firmer and less sweet to sweeter, softer, or even squishy with brown spots as they ripen.
This can lead to your child liking a food one day and not the next. If they have a negative experience with the taste or texture of a food, they may start to refuse it.
Packaged, processed foods, such as nuggets and chips, often have a more consistent taste and texture, making it more likely for children to develop preferences for them as “safe” foods. Continue offering a variety of foods regularly to help them have a balanced diet.
It can take a child 15 or more tries to accept a new food. To help expand their diet, regularly offer new or disliked foods alongside healthy options they already enjoy.
Tips for calmer mealtimes
Set a routine
Make mealtimes predictable by having regular mealtimes seated at a table. Encourage sitting together for family time, even if your child doesn’t want to eat.
Burn off energy first
Physical activity before mealtimes can help your child settle down and be ready to eat.
Pair new with familiar
Introduce new foods alongside ones your child already likes to lower the likelihood of stress or upset. Don’t expect them to eat the new food right away; even just a small nibble or lick is progress. You may need to use a sectioned or separate plate at the start.
Limit distractions
Turn off the TV and put toys away before eating to help your child focus on their meal.
Embrace the mess
Mealtime is messy, especially for younger children learning to feed themselves. Babies and toddlers learn through all the senses, so expect food to be squished, spilt, spat out or smeared across their highchair or table. Laying a towel on the ground and using a washable tablecloth can help with the cleanup.
Let your child decide
Let your child choose how much they want to eat. After mealtimes, remove unfinished food and store it safely in the fridge. Offer it again if your child says they feel hungry later.
Explain that foods as 'different'
If your child rejects food because it tastes different, explain that foods can vary. For example, say, “These blueberries might taste or feel different than the ones we had last week because of where they were grown or how ripe they are.” This helps them understand and encourages them to try it again.
Remember, mealtime challenges are a natural part of your child's development. Patience and consistency will help them build positive food habits and develop emotional regulation over time.
See Child Development - Preschoolers for more information on emotional regulation or Child Development - Toddlers for information on tantrums.