Managing crying babies

If you are a parent of a newborn, there are some extra coping strategies to help you get through this stage of your baby’s life. 

Crying patterns are very common in new babies. They start to increase at two weeks of age, peak in the second month of life and tend to decrease by the age of five months. While it is one of the biggest stressors for new parents, understand that early increased infant crying is common for newborn babies. It is normal for babies to cry a lot as it is their only way of communicating at a you age. People often refer to these long periods of crying as Colic. 

The Period of PURPLE Crying helps parents unpack the nuance of when and why their baby might be crying.

The Period of PURPLE Crying

  • P - Peak of crying: Your baby may cry more each week, the most in month 2, then less in months 3-5
  • U - Unexpected: Crying can come and go and you don’t know why
  • R - Resists soothing: Your baby may not stop crying no matter what you try
  • P - Pain-like face: A crying baby may look like they are in pain, even when they are not
  • L - Long lasting: Crying can last as much as 5 hours a day or more
  • E - Evening: Your baby may cry more in the later afternoon and evening 
Period of PURPLE Crying

Coping mechanisms

It can be very frustrating when your baby does not stop crying. You’ve done what you can by changing their nappy, feeding them and checking their temperature, but what are some other actions or coping mechanisms you can employ if you’re baby keeps crying? 

Tag out

If you have the family and support network around you, use TAG OUT to say ‘I’ve had enough and I’m just not coping right now’. Hand your crying baby over to someone who can look after your child for 5-10 minutes. 

It can be your partner, family member or a trusted neighbour. It takes a village to raise a child and we need to lean on them every now and then to get through. 

Step out

Sometimes we can find ourselves as the primary carer for our baby without anyone in the house to help. In this instance, it is totally ok to make sure your child is swaddled, laying down safely in a cool room and for you to step out for a few minutes while they cry. It’s best for you, as a carer, and your baby to allow yourself that space to breathe and calm down momentarily. 

See Newborn sleeping for more tips on how to safety leave your baby safely in a room.

Reach out

You’re not alone as a parent. Reaching out can be one of the best things you can do to share your frustration, ask for advice or seek further professional help. 

You may feel helpless at times when your baby keeps crying. It’s important to know as a parent that you “can’t fill from an empty cup”. In order for you to look after and care for your young child, you must take care of yourself first. 

See Accessing services for how to find free and confidential support as a parent.

Never shake a baby

Even though parents may be sleep-deprived, exhausted and frustrated when they can't settle a crying baby, shaking them is never OK. Shaking a baby can easily cause short and long-term health complications.