A trauma is a very distressing, painful or frightening event. 

A trauma is usually outside the normal events of life and can overwhelm a child’s coping skills and take away their sense of security. Witnessing or hearing about a violent or traumatic event can also be highly distressing and can have psychological impact on children.

It can include experiencing:

• a serious injury
• being involved in a car accident
• having a sudden poor medical diagnosis
• natural disaster
• the death of a family member. 

Most children involved in a traumatic incident will experience some kind of emotional reaction. Children’s responses to distressing events depend on a wide range of factors including:

• their age
• stage of development
• level of exposure
• the way other people around them respond to the crisis. 

It is important to remember that not every child has an immediate reaction to a traumatic event. Some may have reactions a few days, weeks or even months later. Some may never have a reaction.

Commonly experienced reactions to a traumatic experience may include:

Supporting a child after a traumatic event

As a parent or carer, it’s important to look after your own emotional needs first. Recognise and deal with your own feelings or reactions to the trauma your child has experienced. This will allow you to be available to confidently reassure and support your child. This can be more of a challenge if you were involved in or witnessed the same traumatic event as your child and you may need help from other supportive systems or health professionals.

Talk to your child: 

• Gently explain to them what has happened – aim to tell your child the truth in age-appropriate language
• Tell them that you love them and show them with cuddles and kisses
• Tell them that it was not their fault
• promise to take care of them
• validate their feelings by letting them know it’s okay to feel upset or sad - acknowledge that being tough and brave all the time isn’t realistic.

Encourage your child to:

• get enough sleep
• get regular exercise
• maintain their usual routine of school and activities
• keep in touch with their friends.

Allow your child to:

• express their emotions, whether it is being sad, angry or crying - while it’s important not to get angry if your child has strong emotions, it is also vital not to condone violence or aggression.
• talk about the event as much as they want to, but don’t force them
• discuss how they are feeling
• draw or write about what they feel or what happened, if they want to
• feel in control by offering opportunities for decision-making, such as choosing meals or picking out clothes, where appropriate
• sleep with a light on if they are scared, providing a sense of security and comfort.

Informing school or childcare- Schools and childcare providers are often equipped to manage traumatic events and provide follow-up support for children. Confiding in a teacher can therefore be helpful and will also allow for greater understanding of any difficulties your child may experience. It also allows teachers to keep an eye on your child.

When to seek additional help- most children’s reactions to trauma will gradually decrease over time, often over a three-month period. This recovery time will vary depending on individual circumstances. You should seek professional help if the child has:

• symptoms that continue for an extended period
• is experiencing high levels of emotional or behavioural problems that are getting worse or not improving
• problems related to the trauma weeks or months later
• behaviours placing them or others at risk of harm
• continued intrusive thoughts or flashbacks about the trauma
• persistent avoidance of triggers associated with the trauma, for example not being able to travel in a car or on the same road an accident occurred on
• highly anxious behaviours.