A trauma is a very distressing, painful or frightening event. 

A trauma is any experience that can overwhelm a child’s coping strategies, taking away their sense of security and impacting their mental health. It can also happen if a child sees or hears something traumatic.

Trauma can include:

• a serious injury
• a car accident
• a sudden serious disease
• a natural disaster
• the death of a family member or close family friend. 

Most children will experience some kind of emotional response after a traumatic experience. 

How they respond depend on:

• their age
• stage of development
• how much they saw or experienced
• how adults around them respond to the experience.

It is important to know not all children have an immediate reaction to traumatic events. Some may reactions days, weeks or even months later. Some may not react at all.

Commonly reactions to a traumatic experience by age:

Supporting a child after a traumatic event

You child looks to you for your support and reaction to events or experiences. As a parent it’s important to look after your own mental health. This will allow you to be available to reassure and support your child.

If you were a part of the traumatic experience, or saw what happened, you may need to reach out to your support system or doctor for more help.

Talk to your child: 

• explain to them what has happened. Tell the truth in age-appropriate language
• remind them they are loved and safe
• reassure them it wasn’t their fault
• show them affection with words and hugs
• validate their feelings- it’s okay to feel upset, sad or angry.

Encourage healthy habits

Help your child to:

• get enough sleep
• exercise regularly
• stick to their usual routine of school and activities where possible
• stay connected with friends.

Allow them to express themselves

Let your child:

• talk about what happened if they want to
• share their emotions with you or another trusted adult
• draw or write about what they are feeling
• make small changes or decisions allowing them to feel more in control, like choosing dinner for the night or what clothes they wear
• sleep with a night light if it makes them feel safe.

Let school or childcare know

Teachers and childcare staff can help support your child after trauma.

Letting them know what happened, with as much or as little information as you choose, can help them understand any changes in your child.

It’s helpful to inform them on whether your child will be attending or staying at home for a while. This will help them plan support appropriately or prepare for your child’s return.

When to seek more help

Most children will tend to feel better within a few months, including their reactions to the traumatic experience. This recovery time will vary depending on your child’s development and situation.

Some children will need extra support. Speak to a health professional if your child:

• has thoughts or behaviours that could harm themselves or others
• shows strong reactions that continue after a few months
• is having more emotional or behavioural problems that aren’t improving
• still struggles with reminders of the event weeks or months later
• has signs of anxiety or fear that are getting worse.