Toilet training for toddlers
Children learn to control the muscles responsible for bowel and bladder control around two to three years old.
Some children may be ready from as early as 18 months old. While some children quickly pick up the skill, some will take longer.
Often, boys tend to be ready later than girls, and it is more common for children to learn to wee in the toilet first before they learn to poo in the toilet.
Preparing your child for toilet training
If you are preparing your toddler for toilet training, you can:
- teach your child words such as wee, poo, wet, dry, and toilet to communicate their needs better when the time comes
- explain and show them what “needing to go the toilet” may look like
- familiarise them with sitting on a potty or toilet for two to three minutes at a time, even if they don’t necessarily go
- go to the toilet in front of your child and explain what you are doing if you feel comfortable
- ensure your child has access to an age-appropriate place to go to the toilet, such as a potty that you can move around easily or a special seat and step for the regular toilet.
Indicators your child is ready for toilet training
Your child may express their readiness to start toilet training in various ways. It is important that you don’t start toilet training prematurely. Starting toilet training before your child is ready may cause frustration and upset your child because they feel they are disappointing you.
So, how will you know if your child is ready or if it is too early? Here are a few ways they may indicate that they may be ready to begin. They may:
- start to hold their private areas or cross their legs
- say they are doing a wee or poo
- have a dry nappy for two hours or more
- have regular times of the day when they poo
- show interest in the toilet
- be able to follow one-part instructions
- be able to pull their pants up
- be able to sit in one position for up to five minutes.
Toilet training guide
If your child is ready for toilet training, click through these tips to give your child the best success.
Select an appropriate time to begin
If possible, begin toilet training at a time when you will be home often with your child, and there aren’t any big changes coming up. Your child will benefit from consistency. Make the potty or toilet easily accessible.
Boys can sit or stand when learning to wee. If standing, they will not have developed their aim yet. Be patient and guide them. To simplify toilet training, you can get them to sit down until they are comfortable and then progress to standing.
Clothing
Get your child to wear easy-to-remove clothes. This will help you and your child quickly go to the toilet when they need to go and minimise accidents. Summer may be a useful time when clothes may be lighter and looser.
Look for signals and respond
Learn and look out for your child’s toilet signals or cues, such as holding their pants, crossing their legs or being quiet. If your child says they need to go to the toilet, try to take them straight away. Young children are still developing their ability to “hold it”.
Ask and remind your child
When toilet training, check if your child needs to use the toilet often. Remind them before and during activities. Your child is often busy with an activity, so may avoid going to the bathroom for fear of missing out. Try asking your child every two hours and before bed.
Comfort your child when accidents occur
Accidents will happen. If your child doesn’t get to the toilet on time or creates a mess, reassure and comfort them as they are still learning to control their bowels and bladders. Not making a fuss about it will help make your child less anxious.
Praise attempts and efforts
Praise your child for the positive steps they take and celebrate small wins along the way. This includes efforts and attempts for trying to go. You may like to reward their success by letting them flush the toilet. Give your child no more than five minutes to “try” to go to the toilet. Any more, and they may think they are being punished.
Eat a healthy diet and drink plenty of water
Encourage your child to eat a healthy diet with fibre and drink lots of water to avoid getting constipated. Constipation can be upsetting or painful for your child, which could make toilet training more difficult.
Toilet training takes time, and accidents happen.
Be patient and positive. If there is a setback - instead of punishing your child, comfort them. If accidents happen, try gently saying: “Oops, you have an accident. Let’s change your pyjamas and get back to bed”, or “It’s OK, it happens, it’ll happen less over time”.
Additionally, stressful events such as a new sibling or moving house can bring on bedwetting or daytime ‘accidents’, even after a child has been fully toilet trained.
Day wetting
Daytime wetting is when a child cannot control their bladder and leaks urine while they are awake. Regular daytime wetting is not seen as a problem until children are over five years old.
A positive and calm approach from parents and carers can help your child build confidence, reduce emotional stress, and get dry faster. See the Daytime wetting factsheet for more information.
Bedwetting
Even if your child is toilet trained, it can take a lot longer for children to be dry overnight. It’s not uncommon for children in this age group to still rely on nappies at night. Children tend to start to be dry overnight between three and five years. However, bedwetting can continue into the younger years of primary school. If your child is waking up regularly with a dry nappy, this may indicate that they may be ready to get rid of the night nappy.
See the Bedwetting factsheet for more information.
Constipation
Constipation is when poo becomes too hard and difficult to pass through the rectum when a child goes to the toilet. It is a common problem in children and can be treated with a healthy diet and good toilet habits. Some children can poo three or four times a day, and others may go twice a week without any problems. Pay attention to what is normal for your child.
See the Constipation factsheet for more information.
Encopresis (Soiling)
Encopresis is also called soiling. It is a condition where children have runny poo that they can’t control due to unknown severe constipation. This happens when there is a build-up of loose, liquid poo that leaks around the hard, older poo that is stuck in the bowel.
Speak to your doctor if your child shows signs of encopresis or soiling. See the Soiling and encopresis - Constipation factsheet for more information.